Regarding that blurb on the bottom of Toronto's press releases

The Goods in The Toronto Star has written up a great little post concerning the new blurb that appears at the bottom of the City of Toronto's press releases.

I used to write press releases for a living. The new footer stinks.

The new:

Toronto is Canada's largest city and sixth largest government, and home to a diverse population of about 2.6 million people. Toronto's government is dedicated to delivering customer service excellence, creating a transparent and accountable government, reducing the size and cost of government and building a transportation city. For information on non-emergency City services and programs, Toronto residents, businesses and visitors can dial 311, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

The old:

Toronto is Canada's largest city and sixth largest government, and home to a diverse population of about 2.6 million people. It is the economic engine of Canada and one of the greenest and most creative cities in North America. Toronto has won numerous awards for quality, innovation and efficiency in delivering public services. Toronto's government is dedicated to prosperity, opportunity and liveability for all its residents. For information about non-emergency City services and programs, Toronto residents, businesses and visitors can dial 311, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

I've highlighted the difference (blue for Ford, pink for Miller). Need I say more?

I wrote a quick email to the senior PR person listed on that press release. Here it is.

To: sjohnsto@toronto.ca

Dear Steve,

I used to write press releases myself. I have some comments. Please pass them on.

I have to say, as a Toronto citizen, The Goods (http://thestar.blogs.com/thegoods/2011/01/under-mayor-ford-press-releases-a-little-bit-different.html) has it right.

"Toronto is Canada's largest city and sixth largest government, and home to a diverse population of about 2.6 million people. Toronto's government is dedicated to delivering customer service excellence, creating a transparent and accountable government, reducing the size and cost of government and building a transportation city. For information on non-emergency City services and programs, Toronto residents, businesses and visitors can dial 311, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week."

This doesn't work for me.

First, the phrase "delivering customer service excellence." Since when am I a *customer*? I'm a taxpayer, a voter and a citizen, not a customer.

Second, it advertises to the world that we don't have a "transparent and accountable government" as we are merely "creating" it. Not positive. Even if true, why bring it up?

Third, "reducing the size and cost of government." Well, people can argue over this as to whether its a positive or negative and if it should be featured on a press release footer. What I do know is that what it replaces was far superior: "Toronto's government is dedicated to prosperity, opportunity and liveability for all its residents."

Am I to assume that Toronto no longer believes in these things?

Actually, all that was removed is vastly superior:

"It is the economic engine of Canada and one of the greenest and most creative cities in North America. Toronto has won numerous awards for quality, innovation and efficiency in delivering public services. Toronto's government is dedicated to prosperity, opportunity and liveability for all its residents."

Put it back, please.

I do like the "building a transportation city" phrase. If only it were true.


Sincerely,

Mark Francis
Ward 18